7 Jul – The fireworks in Miami had just concluded when a white, 32-foot boat carrying five young adults crashed violently with another vessel in the night.

The boat’s operator was thrown overboard. Another passenger was tossed into the water, and two others left critically injured and unconscious.

With no one at the helm, the boat circled in the dark, crashing into a third vessel before a commercial salvage crew was able to pull up alongside it, jump aboard and bring it to a stop.

When the waters calmed again, rescuers struggled through the dark to piece together a devastating toll: Four dead, eight injured.

An absolutely horrible tragedy.  Can you even imagine what it must have been like to witness this?  Or even worse, to be involved?  Sheer and utter chaos.  On a night of universal celebration throughout our great nation, young lives were lost.  The only point I want to make about this is simple.  This could have been avoided.  Here’s why.

Pino said the minute the fireworks conclude boaters typically rush toward Dinner Key Marina, hoping to get their boat out of the water first.

“So you have hundreds of vessels moving at one time, in the dark, which is a recipe for disaster,” he said.

Why are we always in such a goddamn rush in this country?  It’s the 4th of July.  You would think on a holiday of all days people would be down to just chill.  Kick back, relax, have a few more beers.  I mean, you’re on a fuckin’ boat in Miami.  That’s gotta be pretty high up on the list of best places to be on the night of the 4th.  But no.  The instant the fireworks finished, every single boat in the water made a B-line for the marina, in the dark, most likely all liquored up.  A fool-proof recipe for a horrific accident.  And obviously that’s exactly what happened.  Tragic.

Since I’ve been on a good amount of flights lately, this immediately reminded me of people getting on and off an airplane.  They announce it’s time to start boarding and people fucking jump out of their seats like it’s first come first serve and there isn’t a reserved seat waiting for them.  It baffles me every single time.  I sit back and watch all the idiots in a rush to wait in line to scan their ticket just to get into the jetway and wait in another line.  So dumb.  Meanwhile, I chill for another 10-15 minutes and wait for the absolute last call.  Like literally when they’re about to close the gate door.  Zero lines. You scan your ticket and at this point everyone has already settled into their seats. You walk down the aisle with all the plebeian’s eyes on you like you’re the fucking king of the plane.  And you know why? Because you are.


jetway lineThe exact same thing goes down when you reach your destination and the “ding” happens, signifying you’re clear to unbuckle, get your bags, and get off the plane.  People instantly stand up, awkwardly hunched over because you have about 5 feet of clearance, and stay that way for 5 minutes before the line actually starts moving.  Once again, mind-boggling stuff.  I mean I get it if you’ve got another flight to catch and time is tight but what are you going to do?  Levitate over all the people in front of you?  You still have to be realistic.  Stay seated, wait until you see people ahead of you actually moving towards the exit, then make moves and haul ass through the terminal if you need to.  It’s just science.

Moral of the story here is patience, people.  Let’s all slow down a bit.  Practice a little bit of patience, and maybe lives can be saved.


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