WARREN SAPP: UNANIMOUS CAPTAIN OF THE DOUCHE-SQUAD

4 Jul

So I guess Warren was at some sports bar in Florida for the USA vs. Belgium match and wasn’t pleased with his service at all.

sapp tip

If you can’t make out his chicken scratch on there, it says “Boys Don’t Tip!”  This is in reference to, as the 26 year old waitress claims, her asking, “Hey boys, what can I get you to drink?”  Pretty standard, right?  Well not on Warren’s watch!  Supposedly he replied “We’re not boys. I’m a man.”

 

That was it.  But that one comment was enough for Warren to tip nothing.  Such a douche move.  The douchiest really.  And it doesn’t surprise me in the least bit.  A few years ago I was fortunate enough to attend and play in a celebrity golf tournament in Anguilla hosted by former NFL player Ruben Brown.  My buddy Matt’s dad owns villas on the island and they sponsored the tournament so that’s how that happened.  It was an incredible experience that allowed us to rub elbows with dozens of former NFL, NBA, MLB, and NHL athletes, all of which were extremely friendly and receptive to us except for, you guessed it, Warren Sapp.

We first saw that fat-ass when we initially arrived at the airport in St. Martin and I went up to him to let him know I’m a fan (not even true) and that we’d be playing in the golf tournament as well.  He literally pretended like he didn’t hear or see me.  Whatever. Fuck him. I’m on vacation in the Caribbean.  Where’s the booze?  The next day at the tournament, we found ourselves right next to him at the driving range and again as they loaded our bags onto the golf carts.

sapp golf

(There’s his horrendous swing with my friend Matt in the background)

I figured I’d give him the benefit of the doubt.  Maybe he actually didn’t hear me at the airport…which was basically impossible but fuck it, I’m a good guy, I give second chances.  I don’t recall exactly what I said or asked but it was certainly harmless.  At least this time he acknowledged my presence but it was all one-word answers with an overwhelming air of ‘get the fuck away from me white boy.’  I can almost guarantee that’s what he was thinking in his fat head.  He clearly just hates white people, except when they have something he potentially wants or needs, like money.  Cause he definitely needs money.  He filed for bankruptcy in 2012.  He also made a 100k bet on the Broncos over the Seahawks last Super Bowl with Rick Ross.  No wonder he doesn’t tip.  Can’t afford to eat as much as he does and tip on top of it.  Might as well tell it like it is, Warren, instead of blaming it on an innocent waitress using an extremely common term to address people of all ages and races.

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