30 Jun

ARLnow– There was “chaos” on the streets of Clarendon Saturday night when a naked bar crawl attendee ran from police, hopped in a car and led cops on a high speed chase that ended in a crash.

Just past 8:00 p.m., police say a man who had been participating in the All American Bar Crawl stripped naked in Goody’s (3125 Wilson Blvd) pizza restaurant. The man, described as a black male in his 20s, left his clothes in the restaurant and ran outside, where police quickly gave chase, according to Arlington County Police Department spokesman Dustin Sternbeck.



Looks pretty fuckin’ bright outside for just past 8 pm but I’m no weatherman.  Regardless, an absolutely epic bar crawl display by this guy, 22 year old Charles Mack.


A more recent NBC Washington article has come out and he was going to be celebrating his 23rd birthday at the strike of midnight.  Wow, just wow. So obviously he’s boozing all day, feelin’ nice and loose, says fuck these clothes and gets into his birthday suit. Like what’s the problem here?  This should be the one day all year that you can get butt-ass naked wherever you want with no repercussions.  Police must not have known it was the day of his birth though because they gave chase, he found a car, crashes into some other cars, gets out, gets tazed, the rest is history.  Mack was eventually charged with indecent exposure, DWI, disregarding police demands, 3 counts of hit and run and one count of possession of narcotics.  I’m guessing weed but a part of me thinks something more intense like crack or PCP.  I’ve gotten as blackout as the best of them but never felt the need to disrobe in public but maybe that’s just the Mack-daddy’s thing. To each their own.

The real tragedy here though is that there’s no video of this.  I feel like there has to be though, right? If you’re drunk in the street watching this go down how is that not your immediate reaction??  Doesn’t really surprise me though.  I used to live in Arlington, VA and people in Clarendon have their heads too far up their own asses to think with any type of real logic.  They all walk around with their pinkies in the air, feigning interest in politics and asking how much money each other make. Granted, it’s the nicest area in Arlington but they’re all still just too poor to live in the actual District across the river.  The drunk onlooking Clarendonians did do one thing right however.

One witness on Twitter said the largely intoxicated crowd that gathered started chanted “USA” as the nude man was detained.

Fuckin’ right.



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